Riding the Cancer Coaster: Survival Guide for Teens And Young Adults
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How to Write about Your Experiences

1/28/2016

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I recently received a really nice message from someone who read my book.  He told me how reading it inspired him to write about his own experiences.  He believed, as I have for quite some time, that there are not enough resources made by cancer patients/survivors for cancer patients/survivors.  I think these kinds of experience-driven resources can be the most useful, since they provide a degree of understanding that doctors and psychology researchers can't compete with.  So, I wanted to write a blog post about how to write about your cancer experiences.
 
Writing about your cancer experiences can be really helpful to others, but it can also really help you.  I know that in my own case, writing my blog posts and writing my book has helped me to process my cancer treatment experiences and the challenges I have faced as a survivor.  Writing can have a really therapeutic impact, even if you don’t share what you write.  It’s a great way to just get thoughts and feelings out of your mind so they can’t trouble you anymore.
 
One of my favorite poets, Lang Leav, wrote a wonderful poem about the power of writing. 

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Leav poignantly notes that writing may lead you to terrible places, since you cannot write about something you have not lived through.  Writers are tasked with “bringing voice to suffering and torment” but must also “emerge from adversity, scathed but victorious” such that you can “light the way for others.” 

So, how do you do that? How do you process your suffering without getting “lost down the twisted path of self-destruction” caused by “being too indulgent with your experience of these things” ? 
 
When you delve back into your suffering, and write it out, you must remain a tourist to those experiences as Leav recommends.  Do not wallow in the suffering but, rather, look through those tourist’s eyes to perceive what can be learned from that suffering.
 
Basically, when you write, write with a purpose.  It sounds complicated but I will tell you that I have found it to be relatively simple.  I never sit down to write about a challenge I have faced or an obstacle I have encountered without holding in my mind the lesson learned from that challenge or obstacle.   I make sure that, when I write about suffering I have experienced, the story of suffering acts as a lead-in to a piece of advice or word of wisdom.  After all, every experience of suffering teaches us something, even if the only thing you learn from it is that you can actually survive such suffering (something you likely would not have believed before).  That simple realization of possibility, conveyed through writing, can provide immense hope to someone else. 
 
With that, I encourage you to write about your challenging experiences, whether they are related to cancer or not.  You never know who may be encouraged and inspired by your words.
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A Helpful Resource to Share with Your Friends

1/19/2016

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A major factor contributing to an individual's ability to stay positive and cope with having a serious illness is the support system that surrounds that person.  For teens and young adults with cancer, friends can be a really helpful part of a support system because they can provide some "normal" interactions and experiences in the midst of such an abnormal situation.  However, communicating and interacting with friends after a diagnosis of cancer can be really complicated and confusing.  Friends may not want to say the wrong thing so they may say nothing to you at all, thereby coming across as ignoring you and your situation even though that is not actually the case.  You may not know what to say to your friends or how to say it and that is an added challenge.  

I know I personally struggled a lot with maintaining friends during my treatment.  I'm not entirely sure how much of that struggle was related to them not knowing how to act around me or related to how much I was unsure how to communicate my unique situation to them.  Either way, I sometimes wonder how things may have gone differently had I been given advice on the subject.  In an effort to help you avoid my particular struggle, I want to share a great resource I came across recently.

The National Children's Cancer Society (NCCS) is an awesome organization that provides financial and informational resources to children with cancer and their families.  They have also started to develop more and more resources for teenage cancer patients and survivors.  A particularly helpful resource they have produced is called "An Educational Guide for Friends of Teens with Cancer."  The guide is meant to be given in its entirety to a friend to help him/her understand what to do and what to say for you - their friend with cancer.  I definitely recommend sharing it with your friends, or even just taking a look at it yourself so you can get some ideas on how to communicate with your friends about your cancer and your treatment!

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Examples of Awesome Attitudes in the Face of Cancer

1/11/2016

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I started this blog and wrote my book with the aim of trying to help young people going through cancer treatment and living life as survivors to maintain a positive attitude in spite of the many challenges they face.  While I have tried to share many of my own stories as examples of how to actually do that, I thought it might also be helpful to share some examples and resources that also advocate for and demonstrate a positive attitude in the face of cancer.  

So, here are some favorites of mine!

First, StupidCancer has a great blog where young patients and survivors share thoughts and experiences.  A recent posts is one of my favorites of all time since it conveys positivity and acceptance in a genuine, hopeful, and all-around wonderful way.  "Celebrating the Cancer Way" is the name of the post and in it cancer patient Ali Powers writes about how cancer kept her and her friends from celebrating New Year's Eve in the city like any young adult should be able to do - yet Ali writes about this setback in a way that makes it sound like it was  blessing and something that enriched her New Year's Eve rather than something that ruined it.  This perspective is so important and I highly recommend reading her post!

​Second, Cancer Knowledge Network also has a fantastic blog where young patients and survivors can share words of wisdom.  While the types of posts are diverse, as on the StupidCancer blog, there was one recent post that stood out to me because of the positivity it fostered.  The post is called "Top 5 Lessons Learned in 5 Years of Cancer Survivorship" and in it cancer survivor Steve Pake shares his lessons learned in an amazingly positive way.  I definitely encourage you to check out Cancer  Knowledge Network and Steve's post!

​Finally, I recently found a really cool blog by a young cancer survivor named Alexandra Spain.  I read through a few of her posts and I love the positivity and forward-thinking attitude she conveys through them all! The blog is called Battling Roses and Thorns and it's definitely a site I recommend looking at for some great examples of turning the adversity of cancer into opportunities to better yourself and your life!
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New Year New Post

1/5/2016

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Happy holidays and happy new year to all! As we start 2016, I am resolving to write more frequently here and work to share more relevant articles and information! To start that resolution off on the right foot, I wanted to share 3 great articles/blog posts with you that cover important questions and topics for teenage/young adult cancer patients and survivors.  So, here we go :)

1.  Dana-Farber Cancer Institute has an awesome blog called Insight, where they regularly post about topics and questions relevant to people living as cancer patients or survivors.  Recently, they made a post about the question "How Long Does Chemotherapy Stay in Your Body?"  I always wondered about this and was interested to read that the length of time during which chemo remains in your body can be variable.  "A variety of factors can influence how long it takes for the drugs to leave your body, including the type of chemotherapy you’ve received, the presence of other medicines in your system, your age, and how well your liver and kidneys are working."  You can read the full post here.

2. Livestrong's We Can Help resource site is a great place to check out for questions related to particular treatment or survivorship issues.  For example, they share a really helpful review of potential body image issues you may encounter during and after treatment, as well as suggestions for ways to improve your body image if it is something you are struggling with.

3. Young Adult Cancer Canada's Community Stories page is wonderfully original site, full of posts from young adult patients, survivors, and caregivers covering a range of topics.  One of my favorite posts there is called "Time to hang up the cape" by cancer survivor Carina Cameron. In it, she discusses the challenge of staying positive for those around you when you yourself are struggling to come to terms with your diagnosis.  She also provides 6 tips for how to hang up the superhero cape you are seemingly forced to wear after diagnosis, and how to find ways to balance your own emotional needs with the emotional needs of those around you.  You can read the full post here!

Finally, if you have not yet seen my book, check out the Amazon link above, where you can look inside the book, check out reviews, and buy the paperback or kindle versions!  You can also follow me on twitter at @CESchilstra for updates about my book or blog :)  That's all for now! Happy New Year and Best Wishes for a healthier, happier 2016!




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